Friday, May 13, 2011

Cultivating Confidence-Jean's story




Let's just start out by asking who DOESN'T have insecurities? I know I do. For most of my life, my insecurities seemed to revolve around physical flaws. It then seems ironic that although I am getting older and with that comes wrinkles and a slower metabolism, somehow my insecurities have shifted away from the physical. Nowadays, I find flaws in my mothering, my "wifeing," and my job as a photographer. I'm sure that is due to my current top priorities...my kids, my husband, my photography, and my family's happiness. Don't get me wrong...I definitely don't want a sagging hiney, but I find myself questioning myself as a photographer or a parent much more than when I last got my eyebrows waxed.

I would dare say that I am more content with myself now than I ever have been. I'm not saying I have achieved some sort of amazing zen and have found the perfect balance. Far from it. But, I have realized that 1) I just flat out don't have the time to focus on my selfish desires, and 2) I WANT to focus on my top priorities...family, photography, and happiness. It is those "top priorities" that have allowed me to pull away from constantly criticizing my flaws. I love that I don't compare my physical flaws to others anymore. I love that I don't walk by a mirror and suck in my stomach and then obsess about it for the rest of the day. I love that I can sit down at a restaurant without worrying about how many calories are in my meal.

If I could give any advice...it would be to forget about comparing yourself to others....whether it be mothering, a hobby, a career, children, looks, body, etc. You are who you are and you can either dwell and be miserable, or accept and change.

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